Nothing much on telly…

I guess everyone’s seen the Landover Baptist parody site (do check out their store — “Jesus was a liberal Jew” t-shirts!). Well now someone’s come up with an even subtler parody site: OBJECTIVE: Landover Baptist Shutdown

Just to whet your apetite:

The Internet was created by the United States of America — a Christian nation — and should not be used to spread anti-Christian, secular, or non-Christian propaganda and hatespeech. This is our Internet, and we should exercise our position as its owners and as the guardians of civilization to stop its misuse.

Elsewhere on the site is Dr. Richard Paley’s enlightening piece about Evolutionism Propaganda. What’s particularly interesting is the section on Evolutionism’s place in the computing industry. For starters:

The real operating system hiding under the newest version of the Macintosh operating system (MacOS X) is called… Darwin! That’s right, new Macs are based on Darwinism! While they currently don’t advertise this fact to consumers, it is well known among the computer elite, who are mostly Atheists and Pagans.

As if that wasn’t bad enough…

the Darwin OS is released under an “Open Source” license, which is just another name for Communism.

And if you’re still not convinced that Apple are promoting evil, think about BSD’s Devil mascot…

This clearly illustrates that not only is Macintosh based on Darwinism, but Darwinism is based on Satanism… the new MacOS X contains another Satanic holdover from the “BSD Unix” OS mentioned above; to open up certain locked files one has to run a program much like the DOS prompt in Microsoft Windows and type in a secret code: “chmod 666″. What other horrors lurk in this thing?

Genius.

Check out the OBJECTIVE: Landover Baptist Shutdown Members celebrity-looky-likey page:
Dr. Troy Franklin (Simon’s favourite) — Christopher Lee/my ex-girlfriend’s Dad
“Diamond” Jack Holgroth — George’s Dad in Seinfeld
Peggy Miller — a young Princess Diana
Dr. Richard Paley — Fred Astaire
Fred “Skeet” Hoskins — Donald Sutherland

This really is so well done — the attention to God-squad detail is amazing.

Maybe it’s time for a genuine Mad American Christian Website of the Day. The Citizens United for a Decent Internet deserve this honour if for no other reason than the great photo on their splash page. But it gets better… inside, I found that they are calling for a boycott of Wal-Mart, due to their brazen selling of soft-core pornography (which is just a gateway to hard-core pornography such as child porn and snuff films). And what filth do CUDI class as soft porn? Cosmopolitan! Christ, I’d better go and confiscate my Gran’s copy of Woman’s Realm before she gets the urge to go and strangle some babies…

Here’s a Bible Family Tree — all rather Reverend Lovejoy. And if you’ve got a few quid to spare, why not order My Best Friend, Jesus from Faith Development Toys for a child you know to hug?

After all this religion, let’s have a bit of nudity and porn. What breeds should you consider if you’re looking for a guard dog? Where can you buy gardening tools that don’t rust? These and other life questions answered by the Guy Who Writes the Meta Tags for Porn Sites. Much as I hate to link to The Scum, it’s worth it to see Moby’s recreation of the Electric Ladyland cover.

If you liked Futurama, you might want to add your name to the A Future For Futurama Petition (mine was the 110509th signature) organised by gotfuturama.com.

Having just spoken to Si, here’s a link he might find useful when he reads this in the morning. Once he’s feeling a little more human, this site should keep him occupied for a while. And this is slightly more humane than your air rifle mate.

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